Twilight is a horrible book.
Not once ever, did I ever give away a book I just bought on the same week to some little kid because I absolutely was repulsed by it. That book was Twilight. I read it over my vacay in the Philippines and where do I begin?
Before I begin actually, please remember that I love romance stories, I am a girly girl who likes boys and stories where things are sweet, etc, etc, so I thought Twilight would have been the book for me. But it’s totally not!
The beginning was alright. It was kind of interesting getting into the character of Bella and Forks. The interaction at first did seem like a valid perception on high school, but it just started to get lame when every male character in the book wanted to get up Bella by the second or third chapter. Like is this original? No. It’s obviously playing on the popularity of stories like that in anime, where there’s this helplessly cute girl everyone wants to bomchickawowow. From there Bella has NO character development. She’s just the SEXOR chick who’s blood smells good from then on.
And Edward? Ok. No character development either. He’s just cool because he’s a sexy vampire. Like Lestat. Oh shit! We’ve seen this before! If you want an early viewing of something exactly like Edward, rent Queen of the Damned! Original again? NO. And AGAIN, this is SO anime like that he’s saving Bella at every peril she has, he knows exactly what to say at exactly the right time and all the book seems to be after chapter five is describing how godly he is! Like OH! Edward SHINES in the light! OH! Edward has muscles! OH! Edward kisses good! OH! Edward don’t leave me~~!!!
WHY IS THIS BOOK POPULAR? I read it til’ the end to figure out a generation of readers have been interested so much in it for it to become a movie quicker than Harry Potter ever got on that boat. Nothing. I didn’t find anything towards the end except contrite, overused lines, some very directly sexual though this book tries to pass off as girly teen fiction.
In terms of the actual writing, the author doesn’t do a poor job but there’s no complexity behind the work. There’s nothing that makes you think about life, one complex word from the book is “alabaster” and for writing something formulatic and should be a bang on sensation, the sensation still feels like an over done romance. Making a comedy out of this would be very easy. That and the lack of character development.
I know I’m probably going to get flamed for this, but if you disagree PLEASE TELL ME WHY THIS BOOK IS GOOD. I cried during the Notebook, I totally read a Nora Roberts crime-romance book and finished it, I am so damn easy to please when it comes to storylines, so why do I feel no motivation to pick up the next four???
Here, let me sum up Twilight in a PARAGRAPH:
Bella goes to Forks. Every guy she meets wants to boink her, regardless if they start out as friends. Edward plays hard to get and is a jerk to Bella. Bella finds this sexy and falls in love with the jackass. She figures out he’s a vampire. Then they fall in love, have dinner, kiss a lot, every body part of Edward is described and Mike is not happy that Bella is someone else’s squeeze. Then Bella gets stalked by another vampire. She gets tricked by him and gets her ass kicked by him. Edward, once again, saves the day. Bella wants to be a vampire. Edward says no. They still love each other. THE END.
Wow, I totally agree on your take of the novel. It’s just teenage lust and shallowness packaged in a stupid story revolving around vampires. At least Harry Potter had some sense to it.
gmc01
November 22, 2008 at 3:13 pm
Yeah, I’d recommend Harry Potter to my kids for a good read …but Twilight? No thanks, I don’t want my daughters wanting a jerk of a boyfriend who I’ve been told gets more abusive in further chapters.
salesosnada
November 23, 2008 at 6:11 am
I read the first book and half of the second book. Bella- 2 words. MARY SUE
Edward-4 words SUPER VAMPIRE MARY SUE
Jacob- 1 sentence. Super sweet, loving, a werewolf who cares about Bella and doesn’t leave her, but she goes for the jerk and she sets feminism back another 100 years.
I don’t get it, Bella stays in love with the guy who ripped a hole in her heart, but ignores and abuses the sweet werewolf who loves her and makes her feel good. And she turns him into a borderline rapist who loves her baby and wants to do the naked hokey pokey with her. Bella- 10 words now IDIOTIC STUPID SELF-CENTERED MENTAL PATIENT DUMBASS BITCH MARY SUE sorry for the swearing. Perfect descripitive words though.
Jenni
October 15, 2009 at 4:50 pm
What’s wrong with anime? But I get where you’re going; that everyone’s falling for her and it’s a bunch of cliche shit.
Cut back on the “like” and “totally” next time.
Anonymous
November 28, 2008 at 9:30 pm
WOW you are so right! I just finished that book yesterday to see what the hype was about and all in all i found it a disappointing read. VERY disappointing actually. The writing was bland, the characters typical and their reactions didn’t seem to be natural in the slightest – i.e. everyone seemed to be ’shuddering’. She used that word so many times it was excruciating to read, given especially that it is a best seller and this is what people enjoyed to read! Whatever happened to a broad vocabulary??
Jinan
December 2, 2008 at 1:51 pm
What happened to good writing? Twilight is just a prime example of how the publishing industry just wants money, like the music industry, the movie industry, etc…You really gotta avoid the mainstream stuff like the plague because chances are it’s just shit. There are instance where mainstream is pretty brilliant, but it’s very hard to tell in our times, because everything wants and needs to be sold so people don’t lose their jobs.
salesosnada
December 5, 2008 at 2:39 am
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pexexpamjisee
December 27, 2008 at 11:51 am
ima agree wit u,the book was completely pointless
i hated it, miserable book, i really dont no why anyone lieks that book
every1 was like i twas an awesome book anbd awesome movie, well i just wanna say NOOO IT WASNT!
it was a horrible movie. then they tell me read the book, which pretty much disgusted me. becuz the author explained everything i didnt want to no in detail, and eveything i wanted to no more about, has a very broad detail about it. all in all the book with me gets a 0.5/10
tulai
February 11, 2009 at 3:54 pm
Well said. The movie completely stank too. Edward + Moody face shots + supposedly mystical glitter = angry viewer that wants an a hour and a half of her life back.
Elli
October 10, 2009 at 9:25 am
ha ha ha ha… maybe twilight is only meant to be a filler movie to which you make out during. even then, i’d switch on something better X3
salesosnada
October 10, 2009 at 7:03 pm
I reckon someone should murder Twilight. Then all the fangirls would go *POP!* into thin air and we would all cheer our butts off.Plus Robert Patterson hated his character. He said something like ‘The more I read the script the more I hated my character. That’s how I acted him.” Twilight even has its own parody, called TwiLite. It’s supposed to be really funny. Unfortunately now twilight is a religion. Cullenism. The funniest ticket to hell in the world.
Jenni
October 15, 2009 at 4:54 pm
I’ve decided that twilight is soft porn for bookish girls.
I work with a girl who talks about how sexy the vampire guy Edward & the warwolves are…
She’s not even a emo, but a nerdy conservative girl. Kind of creepy.
Matt
October 25, 2009 at 10:26 pm